by Seneca Moraleda-Puguan
In 2014, I wrote my first article for Hawaii Filipino Chronicle entitled ‘Love is Worth It.’ My husband John Marc and I shared our experiences in preparing for our wedding in February of that same year. Seven years later and here I am, still writing and sharing my stories, and still loving my husband. In the past seven years of our marriage, so many things have happened and changed, but our love for each other has only grown deeper and our friendship become stronger.
As time passes, we get to know each other better, exposing not just the good but also the not-so-good. The difference in mindsets, preferences, and upbringings affect the dynamics of our marriage causing tension, arguments and misunderstandings.
When our children arrived, our energy and focus were drawn towards parenting. Spending time alone with each other, something which used to be easy has become a challenge. The honeymoon stage is definitely over. But looking back, I can see the fingerprint of our Matchmaker in our marriage. We have seen how He has carried us through and sustained us by grace as we transition from one season to another.
There are days I just can’t help but cry in overwhelming gratitude for His goodness in my life through my husband and our children. Our marriage is not a bed of roses, there are a lot of thorns that pierce us and need to be removed but we are a work in progress. Our union an imperfect one, but I believe it is a beautiful story worth telling to our children and our children’s children. This month, we celebrate our seventh year wedding anniversary. We have reached the what they call ‘seven-year itch.’ It is believed that happiness in marriage or a long-term romantic relationship declines after seven years. They say that it’s a time of turbulence and a potential point of reckoning. However, we are not threatened nor shaken.
My husband and I have had countless arguments in the last seven years, and we know there will be more heated conversations ahead of us. Things will get tougher. Times will become rougher. But together, we will brave every storm that will come our way. Our confidence is this, with God as the center and third strand of our marriage, we are stronger, steadfast, and unrelenting. We will overcome.Let me share with you a short letter to our children, aged 5 and 2, about their parents’ unwavering love. It is my prayer that this will bring encouragement and hope, not just to them, but to you who is reading this as you believe for love that will last. My beloved Callie and Yohan,
Seven years ago, I said ‘yes’ to becoming your daddy’s wife before God and our loved ones. It was the happiest and the most beautiful day of my life. I’ve had many pursuits in my life but spending the rest of my life with your daddy was the greatest adventure and the biggest step of faith I took.
Up until to this very day and I am sure until I breathe my last, I will always be proud to carry your daddy’s name. I am eternally grateful to be his partner, confidante, cheerleader, worst critic and best friend.
There are a lot of happy days, but you see, there are days that we dread too. We don’t always get along; we don’t always agree. There are days are house is filled with joy, there are days there’s deafening silence.
Marriage is not and will never be perfect because it’s a covenant between two imperfect and very different people becoming one. Misunderstandings are unavoidable, disagreements are inevitable. But we will choose to always forgive, even if it’s difficult.
We will choose to lay down our lives for each other, though it is truly hard. We will choose to love even if sometimes we don’t feel like it. You know why? Because we have been forgiven.
Someone laid down His life for us. We have experienced what it means to be truly loved. Therefore, we can give love, a love far greater than a fleeting emotion, but one that overcomes. He is our firm foundation; our love will never be shaken.
And the best thing about this love is that you both have become the fruits, and you are precious and beautiful. You make this love more worth fighting for.
Someday, you will have your own spouses and eventually build your families. It is my prayer that your daddy and I will make our marriage and our relationship worth emulating.
It is my hope that our love story, despite and with all its imperfections, will be worth sharing to your children and their children and their children.
Callie and Yohan, thank you for being our inspiration and our motivation to always choose love.
As we celebrate this beautiful month, I implore you to let love overcome! Happy Valentine’s everyone!